Where has Dad been?

Hey, all -- I'm still here. I haven't made an update in what, 5 months? Ack. Too long, too long.

Mostly, I don't know what to say. It was pretty much my idea to start this blog, because I thought that I'd have all of these great thoughts to put down and needed a venue to do so. But in reality... I'm at a loss for words.

It's not that I'm not excited. I am! Really! How can I explain this? Let's try this:

Remember when you were in high school/college, and you were taking some really difficult class? Let's say Advanced Calculus. The teacher is on the board working through some very complicated problem. You've skipped class the last 3 days, and have no idea what he's doing. You're seeing symbols that you don't understand, and formulas that appeared to be made up. He works through the problem for 30 minutes, and everyone is writing down notes and nodding their heads. They all get it, but you don't.

Afterwards, the teacher stops you on your way out and asks if you have any questions. You don't, of course. Well you really DO, but you can't ask, "Uh, WHAT?"

That's my problem right now... I don't know enough to be scared. I don't know what questions to ask. I don't know how it's going to impact me as a person, nor do I understand the impact on my life. How will I change? How will my relationship with my wife change?

Here's what I do know:

- I can't wait to meet this girl! I feel like I already know her.
- Everyone tells me that having children is the most rewarding thing in the world. I already think they're right.
- I don't really care what happens to my existing lifestyle.


The rest doesn't really matter. I'll figure everything out. There's an awful lot of stupid people out there with babies, so I should be ok. Right?

Right.

Active Baby

Not a lot new to report on the baby front. She's been very active today. I don't think she has slept much today. She's been moving all over the place. She started her beatings on me around 3am. It's sure something when you wake up because the baby is moving around so much. And she's been at it all day. Maybe it's because I've been sitting alot more today listening to others rather than running around going to meetings.

A couple of weeks ago I started to figure out when she has hiccups. That's weird, feeling the hiccups that it. I would say on average that she gets hiccups about twice a day. I tried looking up information about why a fetus gets hiccups and I kept coming up with "cause is unknown", but that it doesn't harm the fetus in any way.

So, there are a couple of pictures on this blog with pictures of my pregnant belly and I've been hearing from people that they couldn't really tell. I look at the pictures I I just see this pregnant belly stick out and can't see how others are not seeing it too. The last week people have been telling me I don't look that pregnant (I'm 29 weeks now) and say it's because "You're tall and the baby has more room to spread out", "You wear a lot of dark colors so no one can really tell", or "You're not really pregnant are you." Other pregnant ladies can tell, but I think we spend so much time concentrating on our growing bellies that we notice the slightest increase. Although, personally, I think it's because I tend to dress in layers (usually a jacket or sweater jacket over my top) and that minimizes the look of your girth.

I should get another picture posted because now the baby is supposed to really start adding weight. She should be adding about a 1/2 pound a week and grow about a 1/2 inch a week. Babies grow length-wise more during the 2nd trimester and weight-wise during the 3rd trimester. So, if she's going to be gaining all this weight, then I should really start to get round.

Daycare Update

Well, I got the list from Rebecca and turns out I had most the names on there already. Only 3 other names I didn't have and one of them quit doing daycare, another doesn't have room, and another I left a message for.

So, looks like just the 4 choices I had already. We've done home interviews on 3 of the 4 and have ruled out one. Her references didn't check out the greatest and things seemed a little off with her anyways. The others are still in contention and I'm checking their references and licenses.

I saw the list of daycares in Owatonna and of the ones that are part of the food program, there has to be about 110-125 on that list. But there are many more people in Owatonna than our little town I figure there is a daycare for every 80 people in our town, and a daycare for every 125 people in Owatonna. So, we have more daycares per capita (like you cared to know all that info).

We still have one home interview to do yet (on the 4th one), so I think by the end of next week we will have a decision and can get our spot held.

The Pregnancy Cult

When you get pregnant, you sort of join a cult. Other pregnant women gravitate towards you, and you towards them. And then there are the people who have fond memories of being pregnant that gravitate towards you (we hate them in the first trimester when you feel like crap, because they don't remember how bad it was and keep saying "It will get better and be worth it.") Those people do nothing for you while you feel like you just want to crawl into a hole & die.

Then there are the people who have not-so-fond memories of being pregnant and feel responsible to tell you every last gory detail of the misery they went through. We grow to hate these people too. I mean - Come'on! We're either just trying to make it through the first trimester, or then we get into the happy phase in the second trimester and they are just making things worth. And if you are a first time mom, the last thing you need to hear about is all sorts of yucky things. Don't these realize first-time moms are anxious enough.

So, us pregnant ladies gravitate towards one another. We provide each other with support and can see each others bellies getting bigger (even if the rest of the world around us thinks we aren't showing). I know I see my belly as getting bigger, but when the NP's (non-pregnants - this includes guys as well) say you aren't, then you just feel like you must look fat. It makes you wonder, how fat did I really look before if they can't see that I am getting a pregnant belly.

It's nice when a multiple-pregnant mom joins your cult (you know, is already on her 2nd or 3rd kid), as she can give you those tips that no one else tells you about. The tips like buying stool softener before you go into labor or the right absorbancy of pads to buy or places to buy nursing clothes/bras, or how medications affected them in delivery.

But as a first-time mom, it's nice to have other first-timers as part of your cult. You are going through this together and can compare notes on what helped (or didn't) with your nausea, which pre-natal exercise videos are decent and which ones blow, when to register for baby classes, having to take that awful glucose drink (although the fruit punch wasn't bad - which came as a recommendation from a first-timer who is just weeks ahead of me), or finding your daycare, starting to get into maternity clothes, and worrisome first-time daddies.

I am not sure what happens to this cult after the baby is born. I suppose some of us may join the same mommy cult. As any single or child-less woman knows -- those cults are out there and you are almost squeezed out of lives because you don't possess membership. I wonder if daddies have these cults as well. I kinda think they do, because daddy has been seeking out support from other parents/pregnant ladies/guys with pregnant wives. Those people without kids sit there looking at you like you are crazy that you could have that much to say about your child. I know - I was there. And those parents just say - "you will know when it's your child or when you become a parent" - that's kind of the parent cult anthem. I am beginning to realize you just don't know - until it's your own. And then you seek out your exclusionary cults for support.

Where was the song?

Well, it was a good appointment. My uterus measure where it should be and the baby is developing at an appropriate rate. So, my due date still stays the same. It seems like eveyone else has been getting their due dates pushed up, mine is staying put.

I didn't get yelled at for gaining too much weight like last month, actually I didn't gain anything, but the doctor wasn't really concerned because the baby is growing at the appropriate rate and is taking what she needs from what I take in. I've actually been tracking my food intake for the last month to make sure I am getting all my food groups in. The month before I was eating everything put in front of me and way too many sweets. So, I needed to monitor my intake a little. I use the current food pyramid. Some people are still stuck using the old pyramid, which they learned years ago in their junior high food class. Actually, tomorrow at my Walking class I am lecturing on Food & Nutrition.

Today was my glucose level test to check for gestational diabetes. I took the fruit punch, as I was told that the orange is awful. So, I would guess it's about 8-10 oz of a sugary fluid that you need to drink within 5 minutes. I've heard bad things about the taste, so I was just going to slam it. I was a little disappointed that there wasn't a ring of people around me singing "Here's to sister Jessica.......she's happy.....she's jolly...." You know the song, and if you don't I am not typing all the words here in my baby blog. Anyways, the Dr. just called with the results and I passed with flying colors -- no 3-hour test for me. Yeah! I got a 96, and normal levels are 60-109. But having to fast and wait to eat breakfast until after the appt. @ 10am kinda sucked.

I also took the time to ask the Dr. lots of questions so that I can finish making the birth plan. I am using a form online where I click boxes and can also enter in information. It seems easy to do and pretty much has everything we need address and has space to add stuff in. Most of my questions had to do with medications & side effects and medical procedures & their purpose.

What to Expect (Warning: Long Post!)

So, I started reading more about birthing and raising an infant and had to start thinking about what I need to bring to the hospital with me. I've been so busy planning and buying stuff for the baby that I forgot about me. I have my maternity clothes, what more would I need?

Hmmmmm....Try pads.....bah! I have to wear pads?!?!?!? Damn it. I totally did not even think of that. That is just not going to be fun. I remember when I got my first period and wore pads -- YUCK! That lasted only the first month and the next month I got out that box of tampons and read the instructions and never looked back at using pads again. Until now..... I kept reading hoping it would say I could use tampons....but noooooooo.....you can't. Bah! Foiled again. Wanna know more about postpartum bleeding, or lochia, then check out the link. But I gotta say -- I am not looking forward to 3-4 (possibly up to 6 weeks) of bleeding. And we're not talking period type bleeding, you are expelling blood clots that can be the size of grapes. Ah hell no! How come no one ever talks about that? No one tells you to expect that. Kinda like the crapping on the
delivery table, people don't tell you that happens. Damn, I hope things don't get runny down there on the day of the delivery.

Ok -so I need pads. I ordered a bunch of Seventh Generation pads along with some SG diapers & baby wipes (we're going to do a combination of disposable & cloth).

But I also need some nursing tops and nursing bras. You are supposed to wait until the last month of your pregnancy to buy a nursing bra, as your breasts will still get bigger as your milk comes in. And apparently the bra size you wear can (& does) change quite a bit in a matter of weeks (making you a band size higher and a cup size or 2 higher) just before & after the birth. So, how the hell am I supposed to know what size I need for sure? I guess about 2-3 weeks after birth your breast size will decrease to the size it will remain at while you are breastfeeding. I think I'll buy some bra extenders and hope for the best, because I certainly do not want to be buying bras of many different sizes that I may only wear for a little bit. What I wanna know is why do most nursing bras NOT have underwire? This is new to me, so is it uncomfortable to have the wire there when you are nursing?

Another thing about nursing bras -- what with the nursing sleep bra (kinda looks like a sport bra in a way). Do I really need one of those? Do I need to wear a bra while I sleep? Are my boobs that heavy & filled with milk that I need stabalization while I sleep? They are actually cheaper than other nursing bras. Maybe I would like to wear those during the day too. They say to get 3 bras: one to wear, one in the wash, & one to have on hand. Maybe one of my 3 (intially) will be a sleep bra and I can see what I think. These aren't the custom (band & cup), so maybe it would work better as my boobs increase in size and then decrease. Who knows.

Ok - so that is the bra thing. But I still need to buy tops. That I suppose I can start getting now because they are the custom fit like a bra. There are so many styles out there, how do I know what will work best for me? And this isn't like the maternity tops where you wear them for 4-5 months. You wear these for however long you plan to nurse. I would like to nurse at least 6 months, but have been thinking about nursing for longer, maybe up to a year. Certainly not longer than that, as if they can walk up to it and ask for it, I just not comfortable with that, time for some whole cow milk at that time.

I got some washable breast pads already, but I registered for some others and will probably play it buy ear to see if need more. I think the pack of washables I bought was 5 sets (10pcs.). They are ones made from organic hemp. I don't know how well I will like them, maybe I should wear a set now for a day and see if they irritate me or not, then I will know that I for sure need a different brand. I have no clue how much my breasts will leak, so I don't know. Any ideas from anyone?

So, I think I will go buy some extras of the toiletries items so start a bag, so that they are already in there and ready to go and I will have minimal other things to remember to pack later on. I know I still have a lot of time being pregnant left, but if you're reading this blog and you know me -- you know I am a planner. I find it's easier on me (& everyone else) if I plan things in advance. Then I know I have things done the way I wanted and I don't have to get anxious about depending on someone else or that I need to inconvenience others.

So, besides the

Maybe planning for this stuff will take my mind off of buying clothes for the baby. I have bought quite a bit already, plus got some bags of stuff from MIL's friend (her daughter was born about a year before our girl is due, so it works out nicely). If people want to buy baby clothes, I would have more use for things that are 9 months & older. I might not get to all the clothes if they are younger than that.

Ok - that's long enough now.

Putting Together the Crib

Blogger is being dumb and didn't load them in the order I intended, so they they are a little out of sequence.

Mommy & Daddy put together the crib today, but mommy was taking the pictures, so daddy got to be the model. We needed some pictures of daddy on here anyways.

Here daddy pretends to be baby girl looking up at her PB animal alphabet (matches the valances) mobile. The crib came with a mobile that had teddy bears on it & a night light & vibrated (needs batteries), but we liked this one better for her crib here. I think we'll bring the teddy bear mobile to maternal grandparents' house and put on the brown crib there, it will match better with that.

We figured out how to lower the railing and it is a pretty swift deal. Daddy had it lowered here so that he could pretend to crawl inside.


Here's another picture of daddy with the finished product. This time the railing is up. I put a PB skirt that is white with 2-tone green ric-rac on the bottom. I have a matching bumper, but the bumper just doesn't work right at this height. Plus, a bunch of stuff I read says you shouldn't use a bumper in the first year anyways, to keep the baby from smothering themselves against it.

So, we'll save it until later.






Here daddy is putting together the trundle that goes underneath the crib. We filled it with sheets and blankets.

This was probably the biggest pain for him to put together. The directions were a little confusing, as some of the comments said, but it took us about 35 minutes to put the crib together, not as long as others on the comments section said it took them. It's a nice looking crib.





Here is a picture that should have been first . Daddy is putting together the crib here. It's a 4-in-1 crib that later can be made into a toddler bed, a day bed, and full-size headboard. There are some extra parts to help convert it later on.

Note the fat cat sitting there that was no help at all. He thought it would be fun to stay laying in the way while we built around him.

Nursery Pictures

This first picture is of the N side of the nursery. Pictured is the changing table, diaper pail, & closet door.














This is a picture of the NE corner of the nursery. The dresser was mine as a kid, with updated paint & knobs.











This is the SE Corner of the nursery, featuring the crib.














And finally, the SW corner of the nursery with the rocker, my boppy, and nightstand (which used to be in this bedroom and got a color update.)

Crib

The crib came in the mail today. My in-laws bought it for us. Hopefully we get it put together this weekend. The reviews I read of it said that the instructions were not easy to follow so it took a little bit of time to get together.

I have a bumper/skirt set & sheets & a mobile already. So once it is set up I will take a picture & post it.

Looking for a Daycare

It just seems strange to be looking for a daycare for our baby when she hasn't even entered the world. But if we want options we need to look in advance.

I talked to 5 daycares today and 4 of them have openings for infants (3 of those for August, 1 for right now but could still in August if they don't fill). I met with one daycare provider today while kids were there to observe and tonight we went back to interview her further and so the daddy can be part of the interview process. We have another interview set up for Friday. I left messages at a bunch of other places. My friend Rebecca is the Executive Director of the Parent Provider Connection, so we'll probably do their referral service. Costs $60 and is good for 6 months (I think that is how long) and they do a computer matching thing based on your requirements.

I made up lists of interview questions for phone interviews and in-person interviews from a bunch of lists of questions I found online. And of course I organized them all and put them in a little binder with tabs.

We liked the one we visited with tonight, but we have nothing to compare it too. So, after talking with and visiting a few other places, we'll have a better idea. Now I have some references to check on from that daycare provider, as well as checking her license with the state to make sure everything is on the up & up.

We mainly want to find a daycare in our town, as it will be most convenient for both of us (since I work S and he works N.) Of the 5 I talked with, only 1 was in a different town (where I work.) So, there are already 3 possibilities in our community.

Guess that's it for now.

27 Week Picture

Ok - here are a couple more pictures. People have been saying they like when I post pictures.

I am now in my 27th week. My stomach now sticks out further than my double D's. Scary huh!!!!?!?!? And it will only stick out further yet in the upcoming 13 weeks.

13 weeks left! Can you believe it?!?!? This now makes it that I am officially in my 3rd trimester. We're entering the homestretch here. So, above is a picture taken just a bit ago, in the nursery. So, you can see the color we painted it. You can kinda see the PB Alphabet Soup valances & sheers on the windows that we put up. The crib mattress is there. MIL said the crib should be here any day. And you can also see the bassinet we got, which will probably be in our room.

The other picture is of this cute little blue & white cheerleading outfit I pickedup at Nike the other day. It's a 12-month outfit (onesie & jumper) that she will grow into, but it was so cute that I couldn't resist. Actually, I have not done much resisting when it comes to buying clothes for her already.

Feeling Good.

I have been feeling pretty good the last few weeks. I am happy about that. My low-back has been a little out of whack -- but nothing painful, just annoying.

I finally feel like I am that happy, glowing pregnant lady.

I am showing to the point where people know I am pregnant and don't just think I have been eating too many krisy kremes. I don't have that white, grey look of nausea anymore. The maternity clothes actually fit decent now and I am not struggling to find some that fits.

I feel the baby kicking, hitting, bumping, hiccuping all the time now and it makes me smile. Smiling suits me.

The heartburn has subsided. I still have some energy, which is supposed to leave again soon, but I'll enjoy it while I have it. I've got pretty much everything I need for when the baby comes, just need a baby (in due time.)

It kinda sucks that I have to pee every hour or two, really sucks when I am trying to sleep. But just learned I need to get to bed even earlier so that I can make up for those interupptions, so it's only mildly irritating.

I'm feeling good.

An Athlete

They say the baby is most active between 24-28 weeks. And she is sure active. Her favorite time to kick the shit of me is when I am falling asleep. She wakes me up with her kicking too.

Actually - I kinda like the kicking. It tells me that I have a healthy, strong baby growing inside of me. Just as long as she doesn't kick me once she gets out.

My parents said I kicked a lot - like A LOT. So, maybe she's taking after mommy already. This will be one girl that won't be able to sit still if that is the case.

We'll have to get her involved in sports early on so that she can get out some of her energy.